The End of the World...Or Just The World As We Know It?

 The past month I have been channeling both publically and privately more than ever before and there has been one particular theme that continues to surface during every  session…the need to clear. We are being urged to rid ourselves of old emotions, patterns and paradigms. With the new energies coming in, we will no longer be able to hang on to that old emotional baggage we’ve been carrying around for most of our lives or continue to have those limiting beliefs.

Most people aren’t sure how to start or what to do in the monumental task of clearing. The process now can be very quick and doesn’t require years on a therapy couch. Simply acknowledging you are the director in your own play of life, and that you’ve created everything that has happened to you is the first step…which is a major one. Most of us don’t want to take the responsibility of being the architect in what we have created. But you determine who you asked to be the actors, what was the story line,  what happened, the lessons learned and lastly what gifts did you take away from it?  By taking a pragmatic approach, you can quickly list the major events in your life, relationships, traumas, etc and spend some time reviewing and clearing away the old emotional debris.

You may be indigently crying, “but I did that already.” True you may have, but this is a last pass before these energies shift. And in addition, you have never been at this high of a vibrational level before and you’ll see things in a different light.

There are nine days between 12/12/12 and 12/21/12 which is when the Age of Aquarius ushers in and the planets align bringing in a whole new batch of energies. You may choose not to do anything in response to this, and that is fine.  Rest assured, spirit will give you the lessons regardless. My suggestion is that you be proactive and do some of the heavy lifting yourself to ensure you are paying close attention to the details of your life before the universe gives you the lessons in its own way, which is not always the most gentle.

Here is a series of public channelings I have done in the past month. Please open with Windows Media Player and enjoy.

12/12 Channeling Atlanta, GA-Open with Windows Media Player

Teatrees Boutique  and Spa Channeling Blue Ridge, GA

Lifestream Center Channeling Roanoke, VA

I would also like to share an activation which was given in the 12/12 channeling in Atlanta. This will help set the stage for you to clear more easily and effortlessly. Wishing you the best in this exciting time of transition! Love and Light, Becky

12/12/12 and 12/21/12 Activation

I am one with my I AM presence and welcome all my guides, angels, loved ones in spirit and teachers to come forth at this time to assist in clearing anything unresolved in my physical, mental, spiritual, emotional, etheric and causal bodies. It is with an open heart and intense desire that this clearing prepares me in every way to absorb and integrate the powerful heart energies coming in the next 10 days.

 I accept the mantle of service and wear it proudly for this is my life’s purpose to be here during this time and to share my experiences and healing with others as they make their transitions. Through this clearing and activation, my passage into this new energy will be balanced and smooth, allowing me to pass into the next dimension with effective ease.

At this time I relinquish any and all issues or experiences I have been holding onto, old paradigms and patterns that no longer serve me and thought forms that are not of my highest and greatest good. I celebrate the new energies flowing forwards and accept each shift with gratitude. I am blessed to be a part of this process and willingly transcend into the next dimension with grace. I believe that this is so…so be it.

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you're a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key. Beckyis a change consultant and channel. Should you need assistance in understanding the changes in energy and how to cope with the direction of your life, contact her: arringtonb@aol.com or 770-649-6368, www.channelforchange.com

                    Discover the Passion, Power and Purpose Within

 

 

 

3 Days of Light Gathering...Passing the Torch

“3 Days of Peace and Music” was the motto of Woodstock in 1969, yet also described an incredible weekend recently  in Asheville, NC at the “3 Days of Light Gathering.” Just a mere 43 years later, we are just now truly dawning the Age of Aquarius and the attendees, much like before, were focused on peace, love and harmony.

 Walking into the dining hall the first evening when the volunteers arrived, had me calculating the age difference  and feeling very geriatric, until I realized  Sacred Geometry artist Charles Gilcrest was older than I was! But who’s counting? These were kids- darling, open, spiritually hungry kids. But don’t let their age fool you; these are very old wise souls with an important agenda before them.  

Although as a speaker I had wisdom to share, this was anything but a one way experience. I soaked up incredible information from each and every person I met and quickly understood that they were born this way and their time had come.

The first night of the festival,  I spoke at a cabin at the top of the mountain with the cold wind whipping through the screened windows, yet the hearts in the room were warm and open. It was a powerful message to each of them to hold the space for the upcoming weekend and addressed their future work in the world. I realized then that the old Woodstock crowd (of which I was a part of) had been holding the energy for so many years, waiting for these enlightened ones to grow up and take our place.

My main channeling was scheduled in the dining hall Saturday morning. Watching the sleepy eyed people stumbling to wake up and eat, I decided to grab a mic and work the breakfast crowd of around 100. That made much more sense than trying to form a smaller group up front and compete with clanging dishes, I just spoke over them. The questions were insightful and inquisitive and it quickly became apparent just how interested this group was for practical spiritual knowledge. I spoke for two hours on a variety of subjects and ended with a guided meditation where everyone in the room met with their guides.  Quite a few people eloquently shared their experiences, all with amazing detail and understanding.

 Afterwards and throughout the weekend, many continued to ask for more information. One girl shared with me that the talk was the most succinct, clear, step by step, practical information she had ever heard.  Fortunately there were several other opportunities to teach and channel throughout the weekend, including a private group in the Magical Love Bus, yes shades of Woodstock indeed!

One young girl asked to join me for lunch. With her dred locks and long skirt, I assumed she was a traveler making the festival circuit. Upon further discussion, I learned she was traveling alright, but to gain support and funding for her non-profit which was to help feed children.  Never assume anything. 

These kids were the wisest, most tapped in group I have ever met, totally focused on expanding their consciousness and making a difference in the world. Couple that with their technical knowledge and penchant to share their learning and make the world a better place and the potential is limitless.

 I have newfound hope after this gathering and look forwards to more opportunities to connect.  I, like many others of my generation have been holding the space, light and energy for many years waiting for the world to catch up and come to its full consciousness.  I’ll continue to share my wisdom helping others awaken, but will gladly pass the torch to this beautiful generation of kids who want so much for the world and have the energy and imagination to create it.

 

 We have an online FB group called 3 DL Conscious Contacts.

Listed here are the recordings of my channelings throughout the weekend.

November 2nd Friday night Channeling http://www.sendspace.com/pro/dl/klcjnp

November 3rd Saturday Channeling http://www.sendspace.com/pro/dl/84d2q8

November 4th Sunday Channeling http://www.sendspace.com/pro/dl/ug1go0

Contact Becky Arrington at 770-649-6368 or email at arringtonb@aol.com to schedule your personal channeling. Cost is $100.00 per session, $50 for 3Days of Light attendees. A recording of the session is sent to you.

Website: www.channelforchange.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Becky-Arrington/122590701229656

 

I would like to share the following testimonial from the 3 Days of Light Gathering:

We met a few times at this weekend’s gathering in Asheville, NC. I attended your talk in Eden Hall as well as the session in the Summit House! I wanted to reach out and thank you for opening me into this new realm of living! Of course i have 1000 questions but my intention is not to ask you all of them. I would love to hear the recordings you did of the channels this weekend! I am deeply interested in knowing more about myself from past lives but at this point am unsure how to obtain this information. I learned this weekend that i will be able to find a lot of these answers within myself but was also hoping you might be able to direct me in the right direction! I intend on finding a spiritual coach to help me with this also, or perhaps multiple coaches. I do not wish to stop the immense growth in energy i obtained this weekend and i thought the best first step would be to reach out to those who opened my eyes! Again thank you so much for your guidance this weekend and i will see you the next time i have the opportunity! I hope you enjoyed the weekend as much as i did!

 

Ruby Slipper Revelations

When Glenda the Good Witch informed a bewildered Dorothy that she indeed had the power all along to have anything she wished for embodied in the ruby slippers, including a trip back to Kansas, we all took a collective sigh. Imagine possessing something that amazing yet not having a clue?

We all have our own pair of Ruby Slippers and rarely realize or employ their magical abilities; to create, to heal,  basically to have anything we want.  The key is understanding we possess that power within ourselves and then learn how to use it. Our thoughts and words are how we manifest. Nobody else can tell you what to think or say, or keep you creating what you want in the world. But by the same token, you are also the only one who can block those creations from happening…again through your words and thoughts.  And THAT is the issue.  

If we are the only ones who can create and we are the only ones who block things from working out, that means whatever is happening in our world is our own doing. Pretty much rules out the role of victim, huh?. How much of our own success and happiness do we prevent through not believing we are worthy or don’t possess the ability to succeed? Do you spend more time thinking up excuses as to why you can’t have something instead of determining ways to get it? People spend an inordinate amount of time arguing for their own limitations.

Sure there are mitigating circumstances or events that occur in our lives that we may think are the reason for a failure, but those are merely rooted in your own original thoughts, and is the way the universe  brings those ideas or feelings to fruition. Look back over events in your life both positive and negative with this new filter and determine what thoughts did you hold that were the true cause for the occurrence at the time.

This realization will open up a whole new world, for it puts you in full control of everything that happens in your life. It all originates with your words and thoughts, no matter how fleeting. They are the most  important tools we have, treat them with intention and respect. Too often we have a cavalier attitude in what we say or think, as if they didn’t matter. In order to be better disciplined, imagine whatever you say or think will happen 3 minutes afterwards and see if you aren’t more careful.

Then click your heels three times and make it so!

 

 

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.

www.channelforchange.com

 

T is for Tolerance...Reflections on Gay Pride 2012

As I was watching the Gay Pride parade from the corner of Peachtree and 10^th in Atlanta, I was struck by how far the movement had come. Thousands of people lined the streets; gay, straight, lesbian, transgendered, bi-sexual, a-sexual, dogs, cats, kids, conservatives, liberals all in support of diversity.

How can there still be intolerance and in some cases, actual hate, when so much progress has been made? How can we still deny basic rights to couples? If so many people come out in support, why can’t we pass a marriage amendment ? Try to imagine what it would be like to have a loved one in the hospital and you’re unable to visit or make important decisions because you’re not legally married. A scenario few actually consider when they adamantly oppose gay marriage.

Although the parade was still a Mardi Gras atmosphere of campy drag queens, dykes on bikes,  skimpily clad fly boys and leather wearing macho men, there was another contingency represented…corporate America.  Coca-Cola, Delta, Frito Lay, Whole Foods, General Motors, JC Penney, Newell Rubbermaid, Turner Broadcasting, CNN, UPS, AT&T, Wells Fargo and Home Depot were among some of the corporate groups represented.  Hooray it’s going mainstream, yet I had to question if their participation was in true support of gay rights or had they tapped into a strong consumer demographic? In fairness, most had  large groups of workers who were marching loud and proud, but the Frito Lay presence was merely a large cheetah walking alongside a gigantic logoed truck handing out snack packs. It seemed like blatant pandering for future sales( although with further research I did find out they were a sponsor of the festival) but it was in sharp contrast to the exuberant UPS employees who were clearly marching for their own personal choices, not to further the spoils of their employer.

The day was filled with touching moments; a huge group of LGBT youth filling the streets; white cloaked angels carrying pictures of people who had suffered and died at the hand of others for their beliefs and lifestyle; hundreds of parents from PFLAG celebrating their son’s and daughter’s diversity, many churches  and religious organizations, and my own personal favorite The Gay Fathers of Atlanta. I’ve spent the last 10+ years working with this group as a leader in the Straight Spouse Network and later as a supporter of families in transition.

 In 1994 my husband of 17 years came out to me. Suddenly thrust down the rabbit hole of disbelief and change, my children and I slowly made the climb out as we came to realize how difficult owning that decision was for him. At the time it would have been far easier to lead a secret life. He had no choice in being gay, the choice was in being honest about his feelings and life, no matter how that affected others. 

I hope in the future there will be no need for a Gay Pride Parade, that the same rights and liberties will be afforded to all and there are no differences. The options others make in their personal lives have no bearing on mine. Even when my husband’s decision did affect my life, I lovingly accepted him, although sometimes kicking and screaming. I honor his choice and his courage to make it.

In the ABCs of life,  along with T for Tolerance, I am also asking you to embrace the letter A for allowance.  Try to adopt a more accepting stance and allow others to make their own decisions, even if you don’t agree. Let’s give everyone the legal right to live and love the people they choose.

 

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.

www.channelforchange.com

 

Life's a Treasure...Start Digging!

As you go spelunking around the recesses of your mind clearing out the debris of the past; love gone wrong , mommy dearest , being chosen last for a team, a difficult boss or a host of other issues cluttering your psyche, it is important to find the gift in each occurrence. Sure it is hard to find even a glimmer of a bright spot in many circumstances, but it is there.

All the happenings in your life were there for a reason and you created them yourself. What!!??   I know, it’s difficult to think that you may have conjured up an illness or a messy marriage, but it is important to dig into the crisis from a higher perspective to understand WHY you developed it. When we get above situations we can view them more pragmatically to determine the dynamics and the players involved. I use the term “players” because I often employ the scenario of a play to look at past events. If this is my production, I have chosen these people to be the actors and this is the plot.

Using this technique gets you out of the emotional space and into a more diagnostic frame of mind. Dissect and examine the story, the different  twists, the setting and the interactions of those involved. Through the eyes of the director you can begin to see why the event took place, the role others played in your growth and eventually what was the gift you received from it.

Too often people clear old issues and understand the reason they created them, but fail to find the riches they received in the process. There is always a reward.  It is not always obvious and could take some deeper digging, but the more you look for the present, the more you may find.

Life’s a treasure, happy hunting!

 

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.

www.channelforchange.com

 

The Party's Over

Whether you decided on a political party based on influences from your parents, friends, partners or on your own, too often we blindly accept national platforms and assume their creators have our best interests at heart. After being inundated with bombastic political speeches, fuzzy numbers and  empty promises from both factions during their recent  national conventions, I have decided to stop the party and figure out on my own what does and doesn’t make sense.   I admit, listening to politicians puts me in a stupor and I rarely hear what they are saying, not to mention understand it all. Which brings me to my personal action plan this campaign season; INVESTIGATE, ENGAGE and ACT.

Researching all the points to a plan is important.  Politicians would NEVER pander to special interest groups, but it is still necessary to fully read the issues and platforms and make sure you believe and agree with what they represent.  With the party marketing machines clearly directing media coverage, our reliance on sound bites and snippets to inform us makes it doubly important to examine the facts before formulating beliefs.

Typically I avoid political discussions. Like religion, it is safer not to talk about it. However with my action plan in place, the second point is to engage. My fear of facing a staunch supporter of either party is lessened if I am confident in my own knowledge of the facts and have good questions. Begin having heartfelt conversations with friends and family to understand why they believe the way they do and to express where you stand on the issues.  If in fact you have completed the first step and explored the points, having a spirited debate should give you an opportunity to flesh out the fine details. If they are merely quoting the party platform or parroting a canned statement from the media, asking specific questions regarding  the issue could prompt them to do what you’ve already done and delve into the heart of the topic further.

The final phase is to move into action, to go the next step and do something to initiate change. We feel pretty helpless as citizens, especially this campaign season if you aren’t a voter in one of the swing states. Communicating with others regarding the important matters in our community and country, allows you to find and gather with like-minded people.  Creativity flows when groups convene, especially if the people involved are not bogged down with trying to get re-elected. Develop an action plan based on issues you and others feel passionate about and share it. Do the research as to what the channels for change  are and stay focused on a positive outcome. Amazing results happen when two or more people come together .

Washington doesn’t have all the answers. The power for change must come from the people. I don’t know the exact steps in getting heard, but what I do know is when pockets of citizens come together for the good of the whole, change will start to happen . We can turn this country around when we understand the issues, communicate and connect with others and then move into action for programs and plans that are good for everyone. If enough of us take the first steps, suddenly the collective cry will be too loud to ignore.

Join with me this campaign season by declaring the Party’ Over and take the initiative to INVESTIGATE, ENGAGE and ACT to develop your own opinions and thoughts about the issues. Find your voice and share it.

 

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.

Visit our web site at www.channelforchange.com

 

Claiming Your Power!

On a political roundtable news show Sunday morning, the pundits were discussing the female vote. Carly Fiorina, a business executive and past CEO  of Hewlett-Packard urged politicians on both sides to view the feminine  voter as a whole entity, not just one concerned  with reproductive rights.  This demographic makes up over half of the population of the United States and as a member, I must say…we are much more than our vaginas!  Interest and concern for the economy, jobs, foreign policy, etc. occupy womens’ minds as well as their counterparts.

No matter how I feel regarding our right to choose, and how shocked I am that we seem to be moving backwards in regards to women’s health and reproductive issues, I will not use this as a soap box. Rather, I would like to explore our hesitation as women to become involved in utilizing our power, initiating change and beyond that, why do we have so few who run for office? Even if one is not politically inclined, most of us hesitate to take a stand in areas that affect ourselves ,our families and children such as education, health care reform, GMOs and other FDA rulings, child abuse, etc.  There seems to be a reticence to become engaged in issues that have a direct impact on our lives. Are we afraid to accept our own power? Are we buying into society’s role model for us or do we simply think the issues are too big for us to tackle?

In a recent discussion group of women, the subject of “owning your own power” was the topic. One of the members said that power scared her, she equated it to force and dominance.  We went on to talk about  how society has defined it through patriarchal examples. Eventually we described power as quiet strength. When I brought up the example of a single mother providing for her family and raising her children as a pantheon of power, the woman smiled and said, “I always thought it was a masculine trait.” Women access their power with stoic potency and determination. They do not have to show brawn or pee over territory to claim their position. They do it through intention, collaboration and action.

In a 2008 study by the US based Pew Research Center found that public perceptions of women leaders were much more favorable to men in key leadership traits. Respondents (over 2,500) said that women were more compassionate, honest and creative than men. In policy matters they were “widely judged to be better than men at dealing with social issues such as health care and education” and in job performance skills women received higher marks when measured for “standing up for one’s principles in the face of political pressure; being able to work out compromises; keeping government honest and representing the interests of “people like you.”

In the eight leadership traits deemed most important by respondents, women were judged to have greater capacities in five (intelligence, honesty, outgoingness, compassion and creativity). In two traits (work ethic and ambition) men and women were judged equal and in just one trait (decisiveness) men came out ahead. I shared this study to set the record straight, we women have amazing leadership qualities, so let’s put those old cultural myths to bed and begin.

The first step it to stop viewing or acting like a victim. Most of us share the helpless feeling of facing big government and the seemingly daunting ability to initiate change . But it all begins with a single thought and we do have the power over our own mind. Altering your language to stop all limiting images and replacing them with positive affirmations regarding the issue is imperative. If you feel passionate about a subject, start a Meet-Up group and connect with others who feel the same way. There is power in numbers in terms of gathering similar energy and moving forwards with change. Use the creative input and strength from the like-minded people you have brought together to research, plan and develop an action plan to move your agenda forwards and be heard. Determine which agencies, news outlets, social media sites and political leaders should be contacted to take your cause from an  idea to a place of action and change. Once you have the intention, anything is possible.

Like the WWII icon Rosie the Riviter says, “We Can Do It.” Start with the belief, form a group, develop a plan, become involved  locally and initiate change. Who knows…you just may be running for office in the next election.

 

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key. Becky is a Change Consultant and Business Intutive working with individuals and organizations.

 

 

Breaking Up is Hard to Do...Cutting the Ties that Bind

Nobody likes a break-up whether it be a romantic relationship, job change or the demise of a friendship. Coming to the conclusion you’re no longer compatible often takes weeks, months or even years of agonizing scrutiny to determine a change is in order.

Once the decision has been made it may take equally as long to muster up the courage to break things off or to quit. In your dreams after you tell your scorned lover, friend or your boss the news, you could make a dramatic gesture of turning on your heels and leaving, possibly even slamming the door for effect. But in the real world there’s the business of cleaning out the office, signing papers or sifting through the collection of personal belongings scattered between people. Not to mention the emotional fallout that accompanies the process both personally and with the other person’s reaction. Difficult stuff for all parties to endure.

After the separation and clean-up is complete, many people still feel attached and find it difficult to stop thinking about the other person or the job. Sure, habit causes part of that and it’s important to change what you do in a day, but most likely you are still attached  via emotional chords. You can separate, vow not to text, phone or communicate, yet still feel the pull of the other person or even to the place of business where you worked.

These connectors are not visible to the naked eye, they exist in the space between you and the other person or even location. Usually we ignore that which we can’t see. But if you are in a situation where earlier relationships are plaguing you, or can’t quite let the attachments to the past go, cutting the ties that bind you might be the answer.

 It is important to remember that cutting the emotional chords comes after you have spent time in the grief cycle.  Understanding the roles of all involved, recognizing the lessons and the gifts as well as processing the loss is all part of that cycle. Once those steps are complete and you’re truly ready to let go, there’s no better way than severing the relationship on all levels; mental, physical, emotional , spiritual and energetic.

If these words resonate with you as something you might be interested in pursuing, whether it be in understanding and processing the situation then moving forwards or in cutting the ties, contact Becky Arrington to discuss the next steps in breaking free of your binding emotional attachments. Breaking up really isn’t so hard to do, once you know to do it on all levels.

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company searching for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key. www.channelforchange.com

Inanely Irreverent ...I Just Can't Help Myself

I have a streak of irreverence. I’ve had it all my life. In the sixth grade one of my classmates was hurt when a piano fell on him. It was a serious injury and our teacher, who was also the principal, had to accompany him to the hospital. It was “record day” when we brought in our 45s to play music for the first half hour of class. Left to our own devices, with only the custodian occasionally glancing our way, I led the charge to push the desks back and have an all out dance party. I mean of all days for the piano to fall on Larry…it had to be record day! Yeah I know, it’s kind of sick, but I really didn’t mean any disrespect, I was just more focused on the opportunity at hand and the absurdity of the circumstances.

It was this same personality trait that got me in trouble with teachers as well as religious and community leaders in my small Midwestern town. I joined Jobe’s Daughters primarily to attend the VFW Dance afterwards next door. My toe tapping to the rock music pulsing through the walls was frowned upon during vespers.  As was my bursting out laughing in serious instances such as being reprimanded in the principal’s office, during graduation and at my sorority initiation. Some people cry, I seem to laugh by finding something oddly funny with the situation, and then I can’t help myself.

This type of cheekiness not only makes me laugh at inappropriate times, but makes me say inane comments when I should be serious and draws me to quirky, offbeat things. We have a collection of fez bedecked monkeys residing next to a diarama of Day of the Dead Elvis in our home. Not your average "Better Homes and Garden" style of decorating.

Fortunately I married a man who shares my bizarre take on art, décor and general inappropriateness.  Our selections in movies or plays runs far afield from musicals and lighthearted rom coms to the edgier side of the theatre. That propensity for dark humor found the ultimate in an art film we saw this weekend called “Killer Joe.”  According to the billing it is a “totally twisted, deep-fried, Texas redneck, Billy Friedkin-directed, NC-17 rated, trailer park murder story masterpiece. Starring Matthew Mcconaughey, it just might be the best performance he has ever given and certainly a change from some of his past roles such as “Ghosts of Girlfriends Past” or “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days.”

Coming out of the theatre we were both stunned by the emotional roller coaster we had just experienced with the violence and plot twists, yet were laughing hysterically due to the dark humor. Thankful to have each other to share both the event and the discussion afterwards, we realized this wasn’t a film for everyone. Our list of people we thought would appreciate and share our perverse taste in the premise and comedy was very short.

As I mentioned, this impertinence has always been with me. But at least being irreverent isn’t illegal. Although it isn’t something I readily communicate to others. I like to let people get to know me first before I unveil my darker, more derisive side. Do you have a secret quirk or trait you don’t share with everyone on your friend list? If so…perhaps we should be friends! I may lose a few after they read this blog post and understand the “real me.”

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key. Visit her web site at www.channelforchange.com .

There's No Magic Eight Ball for Parenting

As I see photos of excited school children on the pages of Facebook with new back packs and spiffy clothing, nostalgia kicks in as I remember my own kids at that age and relive the anxiousness all parents feel as they send them out into the world. How I wish our trusty magic Eight Ball could have assured me they would be ok or how their lives would turn out. But instead inane answers like “the future is undecided” or “ask again later” would continuously pop up, no matter how many times I would shake it.

Those school days fly by so quickly. Kids grow up, and it’s bittersweet to watch as they learn their lessons in life.  When my children were living at home I found it difficult yet doable to allow them to make their own mistakes. In the third grade I decided to teach my son the importance of doing his homework. I had observed so many parents slaving over their teen’s schoolwork in Junior High, when not turning in a paper held more dire consequences. I figured I would let him slide when he was younger to have the experience when there was not so much at stake. True to form he neglected to hand in some assignments and the results were poor grades. It was a valuable lesson and he quickly understood the necessity of keeping up with daily work, resulting in my not having to nag him to do homework later.

Allowing children to fail is pretty simple cause and effect, but how do you help them when they’re adults  and their decisions are outside your realm or the results can be life altering?  As parents we can still have a degree of influence, but ultimately it is their life and they have to steer it. I am sure I am not the only person with adult children who toss and turn at night worrying if they will be happy, find the job they want, make the right decision when the going gets tough, have enough money to pay their bills, have a healthy relationship, eat on a regular basis, etc. But in essence the only thing we can do is what I did when they were younger-let them make their own mistakes and be there as support if they fall.

Paving the way and making things easier does not teach your offspring the lessons they need to learn. No, you may not be able to directly tell them what to do or protect them from harm, but you can take peace in knowing you gave all you could and did the best job possible to make them into the people they are today-honest, loving, integral adults. And that is saying something.

If you’re an empty nester, even though you aren’t sending anyone off to the school bus this year, know that your years of patience and hard work is still having an effect on the children you raised.  And if that is not enough solace, you can always dig out and consult the Eight Ball for guidance. Receiving answers such as “it is decidedly so” and “the outlook is good” can certainly help your attitude on life and maybe even ease your worries as a parent.

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key. Visit www.channelforchange.com for more information.

And the Walls Came Tumbling Down

Ancient civilizations constructed barricades around their cities to keep invaders out. The famous Berlin Wall was erected in the midst of political upheaval and ideological differences, tearing families apart in the process as the communists separated East and West Germany. 

Walls do not need to be made of bricks and mortar to achieve the same results of protection and/or alienation. Many of us build emotional barriers to keep others at bay or to protect ourselves from our true feelings.

“Downsizing the Spiritual Way” is a facebook group developed as an online support and study of  Marianne Williamson’s book "A Course in Weight Loss." In Lesson One she explains how  people have difficulty letting go of experiences that are designed for growth. It’s as though there is a faulty release valve in the processing system and we hold on to the sentiments associated with the event instead of learning, then releasing. In the past I ignored and suppressed the thoughts and memories that caused pain. In doing so, I stopped the natural process for those to be transformed. Some people eat, others drink, have sex, shop, etc as a means of avoiding these feelings.

Over time we build a fortification to protect us from the emotions, mine was in the form of excess weight. Each element in this fortress we’ve erected has an association such as shame, fear, inferiority, pride, anger, judgment, pressure, burden, stress, heartbreak, injustice, etc that causes separation from ourselves and others. Marianne’s exercise calls for us to analyze each block to understand what caused it, how we’ve hidden behind it and whether or not it continues to have relevance in our lives. Dredging up memories and facing unresolved issues is deep and powerful processing. When finished, you work in tandem with your Higher Power to release and dismantle each brick to eventually tear down the wall.

When the walls come tumbling down though, there is no longer any place to hide.  The storage compartments are gone requiring emotions to be processed immediately. My goal is to no longer stuff the feelings, but express them in the moment. Staying in the present forces you to evaluate every thought or experience- learn from it and then release it. Staying focused on the here and now keeps recollections in the past, attached to those original events, unable to cast a shadow on the issues at hand.

 I’m still in the process of taking down my barrier. What I have found is that I have to look at each element multiple times, uncovering deeper layers with each pass. Like real walls, these emotional ones are built strong and have lasted over time. This is not a structure that can be blasted with dynamite, but requires careful disassembling. It was built from fear but will be replaced with love. Being gentle with myself and remembering that this is a journey, helps me chip away slowly but surely at those bricks made of memories.

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.

Stop Dreaming and Start Moving!

How many days does it take to make a change, or break a habit? After making a move last week to put my condo on the market in Indianapolis, I felt compelled to make some changes on the home front as well. Like the beagle in the photo, each morning I would lie in bed thinking I should get up and walk.  I am a firm believer of manifesting and knowing your thoughts create. Years ago when I broke my foot and couldn’t exercise, I read “The Inner Game of Tennis” and thought constantly about my tennis game and what I would do once I was able to get back on the court. My skills were decidedly better after playing so many strategic matches in my head. However in this case, my slumbered walks were not getting the body moving.

I am on my third day of getting up early. I’m usually a 9:30 a.m. riser, some days later depending on how late I was up the night before.  To avoid the heat, I’ve been  walking the dog three miles around the lake and neighborhood early in the morning.  Actually my husband says it is 2 7/8ths, but I say it’s close enough to three to call it. There are some advantages. I’m meeting my neighbors who are also out walking their dogs, but since I am such a Chatty Cathy it makes a 45 minute excursion more like an hour and 15 minutes. My post-menopausal acne has cleared up from the sweat pouring down my face, nothing like an early morning sauna. I’m going to bed at a decent hour instead of staying up half the night.  And I’m ready to begin working by 10:00 a.m. when in my previous schedule that was when I was just having my coffee.

Unfortunately this is not my first foray into exercise or an attempt to start a new routine. As my pattern goes, I do well for about a week then begin to taper off, eventually stopping altogether. I need a compelling reason besides the obvious ones like losing weight, getting healthy, adopting a more balanced life, etc to keep going. I would like to think those are reasons enough to be good to myself and follow through, but self-sabotage often takes the upper hand.

The only rational  I can think of that will consistently get me awake, moving and out on the walking trail is the sight of Bebe the Beagle. Looking up with pleading eyes as I lie in bed, imploring me to get up, she's hard to resist.  I am her only link to the rest of the world and she lives for those walks. Looks like being a dedicated dog owner trumps my desire for health consciousness in terms of motivation, but no matter if the results are the same. It’s a win for everybody, thanks Bebe.



Join our Facebook support group "Downsizing the Spiritual Way" where we are doing a book study of Marianne Williamson's book "A Course in Weight Loss" as well as sharing ways we are finding to approach the process of weight loss differently, from the inside out this time. It starts with your mind. This is a private group, if interested please ask to join. Our next conference call is Wednesday June 13th 8:00 p.m. ET.



Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.

A Balanced Life...or Just Spinning More Plates?

Are you a multi-tasking, hard driving, overachiever? Do you internalize problems, continually mulling over different scenarios in your head? Are you always available and an instant communicator? Is your life balanced or are you just adding more to your plate? And keeping all those platters in the air can be exhausting.

 At a recent presentation for the NAPW-National Association of Professional Women North Atlanta Chapter, I listed the following tips to reduce stress.

Prioritize-Determine what is most and least important

Ask for Help-You're not Superwoman

Put Yourself First-If you won't, nobody will

Don't Worry-Be happy     

Your Thoughts Create-So create magic!

Allow Things to Flow-You can't control it all

Prioritize: It can be overwhelming when you’re keeping so many projects and activities afloat. Develop a list ranking the most important items in your life to the least significant. This not only helps you get organized, it will assist you in determining whether or not an activity is even worth keeping.

Ask for Help: Independent, do-it-all people hate to ask for help. There are co-workers, friends and family who are ready and willing to take some of the burden, if you would just let them. Most of the time we don’t ask others because we want to keep control. It’s time to relinquish the reins and let someone else do some of the work. There is also a host of unseen guides, angels and teachers waiting on the other side, but they cannot interfere unless they are asked. Merely meditating and calling for their guidance is enough to receive some of their divine assistance.

Put Yourself First: Emergency protocol on an airplane calls for an adult to administer the oxygen mask to themselves before the child. The same rules apply in life. If you don’t take care of yourself, nobody else will.

Don’t Worry Be Happy: Naïve, sophomoric, simplistic…perhaps. But it is also a good mantra to live by. All the worry and stress you spend on a problem, does nothing to solve it. It’s wasted energy. If you can trust that the issue will be decided in the best possible manner for everyone’s highest good and let it go, you’ll have less stress and answers will come easier.

Your Thoughts Create-So Create Magic! The Law of Attraction brings experiences to us that we talk and think about. The Secret is a perfect example of this. To de-stress, begin developing affirmations to put your ideas working in a positive way.

Allow Things to Flow: Anytime there is resistance, there is a stoppage or blockage. The term dis-ease is when energy such as thoughts or emotions get stuck in the body. Adapting a process such as meditation, walking in nature or some other relaxing activity will allow issues to roll off of you instead of internalizing them.

I speak from experience. As a former executive, stress was my motivator, it helped push me to the next pinnacle. But getting to the top with depleted energy, poor health and anxiety off the charts is not a winning combination. Adapting a balanced, tension-free lifestyle creates greater successes, is more fun and a lot easier to manage than keeping the plates from falling to the ground.

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.

The Evil Stepsisters-Assumption and Expectation

Although Anastasia and Drizella were Cinderella's nemesis, mine are named Assumption and Expectation.

Assumption got her name from the fact she's not a great conversationalist and thinks people can read her mind. The colorful story of how you spell "assumption" is when one makes an ass out of u and me, which is what happens as a result of not talking, everybody loses.

Expectation is usually anxious, excited and filled with anticipation. When she keeps these thoughts to herself,  a great deal of her time is spent being disappointed. Contrary to what she may believe, her ideas and wishes are not magically transmitted.

The antithesis to both is interaction and sharing ideas. If you clearly state what you want, others are aware of your desires and have the  ability to agree or disagree. Much better than pacing the floor wondering whether or not the other person "got it." In the assumption arena, if everything is outlined and discussed, nobody drops the ball.

Do these sisters ever visit you, perhaps in relationships? Cinderella was saved by the prince and escaped the wrath of her evil stepsisters.  But unless you can find and welcome their cousin Communication into the mix, missed signals, hurt feelings, disappointment and lack of connections may continue to plague your life.

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key. Check out our web site Channel for Change.