Workplace Tug-of-War

To many managers,conflict resolution may seem like refereeing kids on a playground as they're forced to deal with what may seem like insignificant, petty squabbles.  But if you are one of the employees embroiled in a workplace tug-of-war, it is anything but child's play.

Conflict zaps the energy out of the office, affecting attitudes, relationships and production. Organizations are going through rapid changes, which causes stress. As companies downsize and economize, clear job descriptions can become blurred as employees are asked to take on additional tasks, often causing confusion and disagreements among workers.  Nobody is sure which part of the sandbox is theirs anymore.

Under the right conditions, many issues can be solved without the need for a formalized process. People can and do work things out themselves. Bigger and more important issues arise, minimizing the focus on the quarrel. A common task can be found and while working on the project, the clash disappears. However there are also situations that benefit from a conflict resolution meeting.

Mediation and negotiation can be useful methods to solve disputes by working  towards an agreement or a compromise. But with those approaches, the conflict itself often  remains just  under the surface waiting to erupt again later. It's not unusual for an argument to rear its head weeks or months later; cloaked in different circumstances, but the same underlying problem still remains unresolved.

Cross Cultural Conflict Resolution is a practical, holistic meeting process for working through differences. This technique used in the Genuine Contact Program establishes a common ground for all participants to work from, a base line. This is achieved by agreeing on ways in which all parties are similar or may be experiencing some of the same situations.  An example might be the commonality that everyone is having to work overtime during the first quarter sales push.

 Individual conferences are held  to give each person  an opportunity to discuss their grievances and allows the consultant to work with the employee's fixed perspective, helping them to move beyond their own view. Participants also determine what  they would be willing to change and what is non-negotiable. An example could be that the employee agrees to work overtime, but will not work on the weekend. These consultations help ensure everyone is in a more receptive state and ready to listen to each other when the group convenes.

This meeting style creates an environment for true communication. Much of the work was done with each of the individuals as they discussed the problem and determined their role, as well as setting personal boundaries regarding the disagreement. Jointly, participants then progress to creative problem solving to reach resolution. Once all parties concur,  a contract agreement is signed that include contingency plans.

My colleague Birgitt Williams, founder of Genuine Contact Organization at Dalar International has written a series of articles that further explore Conflict Resolution that support the process described in this blog.

We all want to play nicely together . No one likes conflict, but after going through this unique approach managers and employees will understand the dynamics involved, possibly avoiding tension filled situations in the future or leading to them solving their own disputes on or off the playground.

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.