Good Grief….Dealing with Loss in the Workplace

Mexico observes Día de los Muertos, or Day of the Dead, where traditions include building private altars and fixing favorite foods to honor the deceased.  As a society we allow the grieving process to occur as a reaction to losing a loved one, but rarely do we consider what happens when someone leaves a company due to a layoff or the aftermath when entire organizations are rearranged, leaving a wake of people confused and at a loss. 

The same grief process occurs in the business sector as change happens. Understanding and identifying the loss is a good first step, as most have never considered applying the Stages of Grief to anything other than the loss of a loved one.  Change Management models are recognizing the stages similar to those outlined by Elizabeth Kuebler- Ross in her 1969 book Death and Dying. However Birgitt Williams founder of the Genuine Contact Organization has developed a slightly different approach to the phases by adding categories such as the event, memory sharing and the moving forwards of creating as well as arranging them in a circular rather than linear pattern to allow greater flexibility and potential revisiting of phases as needed.
The stages are as follows:

1. Event: What caused the upheaval
2. Shock: Often only sinks in when people begin to realize what this means to them personally
3. Anger: Feelings of rage, envy, normally outraged it is happening at all
4. Denial: Defense mechanism based on disbelief, "it may not affect my department"
5. Memories: Desire to remember how it was before, both good and bad, helps put things in perspective
6. Acceptance: Understanding that the new structure is inevitable and will affect them
7. Letting Go: Moving beyond the ordeal, not harboring anymore feelings
8. Creating: Process of beginning to deal with the change and creating new attitudes that embrace it

Recognizing that members of your organization may be experiencing grief due to change could be the first step towards rebuilding damaged, stressed out teams of employees. Allowing employees to express their feelings in a Whole Person Process style meeting or through storytelling ensures that #8 Creating can take place to move beyond the shift they have experienced. 

Contact Becky Arrington to learn more about how to work through the grief process in your organization and move down the road to recovery.

The Dental Dilemma....Maintenance vs. Avoidance

I hate to go to the dentist. Even during a good check-up having someone fasten a paper bib with a silver clip chain like old ladies wear on their sweaters, fitting me with HazMat goggles to protect from what…flying spit? Tilting back so far my feet are sticking straight up in the air and my mouth is gaping open, renders me…well speechless. Which is another gripe I have. My grunts, nods and eye rolling answers can only communicate so much.

In my 40s I took a hiatus from maintenance dental care and have dearly paid the price since. That should give me a clue in the issue I'm facing.  I'm on an every four month plan and undergo what they call a "deep clean," kind of  like a "deep dive" in business. In the corporate world I don't mind digging for the facts, whereas I am not as excited when they go searching the crevices of my mouth for some errant speck of tartar. Deep cleaning, more like spelunking, is done with a sonogram laser emitting a shrieking high pitch sound, jolting me out of the chair when it is turned on. Gone are the days of the rotating brush and mint toothpaste replaced by a virtual sand blaster that hits your teeth and gums with a force designed for industrial use.

 For several years now the dental office has had me on a "treatment plan" for future work totaling well over a million dollars...well a lot of money. I've been parceling out here and there fixing a tooth once it has broken. The problem with being old is all those fillings you had as a child are still intact while the teeth around them become brittle and break, creating the perfect environment for decay. Not to mention what they say mercury does in your system, but I am not industrious enough or rich enough to replace all the old fillings. Spitting out shards of a tooth after biting down on a piece of  candy has become a common occurrence. Either way you're stuck dealing with the issue, often in an emergency situation on a weekend while you're howling in pain from a broken tooth and exposed nerve. Although I do have a "temporary" fix on a tooth that is going on 18 years, so sometimes my avoidance pays off.

Which brings me to my current dilemma. The x-rays today showed a gigantic ancient filling, probably from the 5th grade, with several cracks running down the side, ripe for splitting in half. I am still paying for an inlay from this summer, which is a procedure that is more expensive than a filling but less than a crown. Normally I would wait until the Care Credit account balance is at zero before putting anymore charges on the card. But waiting runs the risk of the tooth breaking, thus requiring a more extensive, expensive crown as opposed to doing preventative care . Should be a no brainer, right? Take care of the tooth before it becomes a problem. Except I don't want to and I find I often put off things that deal with my body or are good for me. Routine mammograms, colonoscopies, eye exams, annual check-ups, etc. It's a wonder I ever took my kids to their "well baby care" appointments.

So is it a matter of negligence, avoidance or just plain old laziness? I don't delay in getting my oil changed in the car or having the water heater winterized, although those are non-invasive processes that don't affect my body. Why is it we often care for others but not ourselves? Is it self-love or lack thereof, that is part of the equation? Or is it merely an aversion to pain, yes I hate shots and dental work.

Rather than continue navel gazing as I ponder what the root, (literally) cause of my issue is, I am doing the adult thing and have scheduled an appointment next week to begin the process of fixing the tooth.  In the meantime I will spend time visualizing that the whole experience is painless and effortless, after all I believe our thoughts create. In reality, most likely I'll be trying to think up the perfect excuse to cancel the appointment.

But if I do follow through, I'll be finished just in time to sample the sticky, gooey, fall caramel apples. Now THAT'S what maintenance will buy you.

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.

Discover the Passion, Power and Purpose Within

http://www.channelforchange.com/

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Office Energy....Is it Time to Clear the Air?

Leaders are always looking for answers to gain the edge. Comparative analysis, charts, graphs, competitive metrics, all in an effort to get as much personal and professional information as possible. But many executives fail to look in an area that informs their business on a daily basis, and that is the realm of intuition. Looking within themselves and their organization to understand issues and energies not obvious at first glance or at all for most people. We're not talking woo woo and crystal balls, but very high level energy and intuitive readings that have helped businesses and executives better understand deeper relationships and issues that occur within their organizations.

 Having an intuitive business reading can be a game changer both for you personally and for your organization. Becky Arrington is a gifted intuitive and channel that can read the energy of your organization, unveil a different perspective, discover hidden agendas and issues as well as assist leaders become more effective.  Most readings focus as much on the individual as the organization, but can make dramatic differences in one's management style and improve the quality of life both in and out of the office.

Business books are now filled with spiritual principals packaged into the language of success.  Anthony Robbins' techniques on achieving personal power are the same as "creative visualization" methods developed years ago by metaphysical teachers. Legendary CEO's  Jack Welch and Herb Kelleher credit much of their managerial skill to simple gut instinct, the masculine form of intuition and for years women have attributed much of their business accumen to "female intuition".

The unseen world of spirit plays a very real role in each organization. Understanding the relationships and underlying forces at work within an office can help change approaches, clear out negative energy, heal relationships and develop a fully functioning unit; highly productive and focused on the business at hand.

Becky is an independent business consultant specializing in holistic leadership training, change management, sales training and management, executive and organizational health and balance, personal and leadership coaching. As a Vice President, Director and Manager, her extensive background in corporate sales and executive management positions her to address issues corporations face today.
Contact Becky Arrington today to see if a business intutive reading would assist you or your organization.

Living Your Purpose...Lessons from a Beagle

Finding your purpose can be as fleeting and frustrating as chasing a runaway beagle.  Following the dog throughout the neighborhood in full sniff mode; nose to the ground , stopping to inspect some particularly fragrant dead object, this is my chance! Quietly I sneak up, seizing the opportunity to grab the delinquent dog, when suddenly she's off in the opposite direction focused on a much more enticing scent. I have a beagle and speak from firsthand experience.

We have been led to believe that in order to live authentically one must fulfill your life's purpose. But how do I figure out what that purpose is? I've taken workshops, filled out numerous questionnaires, dabbled in astrology and numerology, all in search of what I am meant to do in life. In college I had seven majors, obviously I have trouble narrowing my interests.

In this past month's Meeting with the Masters channeling, the guides said, "We know that many of you are confused about your life's work, your purpose, what you were put on earth to do. What we want to share with you is that IT DOESN'T MATTER what you do. Whether you're a custodian, a doctor, a secretary or a bank president as long as you are sharing your experiences and lessons learned, living impeccably and helping humanity, those are the key issues. It is not so much what the job is or the modality you're seeking, it is the intent behind it. Keep forefront in your mind, in whatever you are doing, what is the purpose? The purpose is to help all of mankind raise its conscious vibration, that is your main reason to be here, why you agreed to incarnate on earth at this time."

Whew, well I feel much better. No more pressure to develop the ultimate venue to fulfill my purpose, no more searching for the perfect vehicle to help others. Sounds like all I really need to do is just "be" and stop worrying . Maybe I should take a few lessons from my beagle and just stop and smell the err….roses.

Becky Arrington
http://www.channelforchange.com/
becky@channelforchange.com

To the 99%...and Now We Start Talking.

Change is the one constant in our lives. Incredible things are  happening around the world, specifically the US as people are beginning to take back their power and stand up for what they believe in, or in some cases…what they are against. Protest is liberating, helps you clear out the pipes through expression and over the past several weeks we’ve heard much anti lingo as citizens rail against established institutions. And that dissidence is important, it draws attention to the cause and the issues. But where do we go from here? I believe it is time to start talking, communicating as citizens and put forth some workable solutions.

In our method of government, we have elected leaders who are supposed to take the ideas and desires of the people and enact them. That system hasn’t necessarily been stellar in the past and falling back into the same heirarchy of officials and leaders doesn’t feel like a new energy to me, it feels like an old paradigm that could simply lead us back to the same results.  Eventually many leaders let their ego overtake their original alturistic goals allowing power to be their drug of choice.
    Open Space Technology is a self-organizing, self-governing methodology that allows people to talk about the subjects they feel passionate about, gives anyone with ideas a venue to explore them with others and in the end a marketplace to share the outcomes or suggested solutions.  It works and promotes a podium for all to share their ideas, not just the ones with the loudest voices. The belief of the Genuine Contact approach   is that the wisdom for any organization or group lies within the collective experience and intelligence of the group.
 You may not join the 99% on Wall Street or even in your local community gathering place, but what about meeting with others in your living room or neighborhood? Exchange ideas, begin to develop solutions to the inequalities and injustices you may be  feeling. Will you change the world tomorrow? No, but you can start to make a difference locally and it will continue to spread from there. It starts with you; by walking your talk , sharing your ideas and setting an example….great change can occur.