Ripping the Band-Aid Off

Sooner or later, you have to rip the bandage off and expose what lies beneath. You can do it in a quick jerk, enduring the pain quickly or opt for the slow pick-away-at-the-edges approach. Either way the end result is the same, you have to tend to the wound.

Weekly I write about thriving in change and how to pick up the pieces and mend the broken parts when life throws you a curve. Yet when I was blindsided last week with a broken condo lease, my own advice fell on deaf ears. Fear immediately came through with the itty bitty shitty committee in my head bombarding me with; "Foreclosure." "Bankruptcy."  " You'll never find another renter." " You won't be able to sell it." "Upside down mortgage." "You'll run out of money." "You should never have trusted them."

Not to mention the onslaught of emotion I felt about the company. After a promotion they insisted I live in that location, then fired me several years later when the economy tanked. So once again I was disappointed. They had their own struggles and had been purchased, with the new organization not willing to pay for an expensive corporate condo. Business is business and these things happen, but the fact that I still had unresolved feelings surrounding the past,  made it impossible to maintain a professional mindset.

When I left three years ago, I packed up my clothes and got out of Dodge, leaving a beautifully furnished condo in my wake. With a soft real estate market and an aversion to facing the situation, I hoped a solution would come through. Fortunately  I rented to my former employer the entire time. I never had to worrying about late rent checks, had trustworthy tenants and knew if there were any issues the company would be responsible. I had peace of mind for a long time and financially came out even. Not something a lot of landlords can say, especially in this economy.

This reflection helped me express gratitude, which quieted the voices. Once fear is tamed, you can think more clearly and start to formulate a plan. In a day's time I was able to seek professional advice and get a true picture of the situation, instead of the distorted view my "committee" was presenting. Talking with lawyers, accountants, mortgage professionals, real estate investors and agents gave me facts . Information is power and I now know my options. 

In the emotional arena, I reconnected with my old boss, putting to rest some of my anger and resentment I'd been holding on to for three years. That's not to say it's all resolved, but finally selling the condo and closing that chapter of my life is an important final step in moving forward.

When dealing with scrapes and bruises in your world, there are choices in how you process them. In my case I hadn't wanted to face the past, so I used the band-aid to safely cover it up. But someone else came along and ripped it off, forcing me to look at the wound.  It is now time to uncover the boo boo, clean it out and let it heal.  Are there any band-aids in your life? 

Becky Arrington guides individuals and businesses to discover their purpose and live authentically. Whether you’re a company looking for innovative ways to lead and engage employees or an individual trying to prioritize, reduce stress or decide what you want to be when you grow up, learning to accept and thrive in change is key.